Monday, June 24, 2013

Single & Married




 
Cast: 
Yvonne Nelson, Nadia Buari, Chris Attoh, Tana Adelana, Kofi Adjorlolo. 
Produced by: Yvonne Nelson

Plot: 
This movie tackles the age-old problem of cheating in marriages. It follows the lives of two sets of friends as they deal with marital problems. With a narrator who is more cynical about love than anyone else, the movie attempts to show that everyone has a part to play in the success, or the breakdown, of a marriage.

Pros:  
The movie was only an hour, 41 minutes long. The wardrobe (for the most part), production, music, and acting were on point. The film definitely had some important insight into what it takes to make a marriage work. It was kind of funny.

Cons: 
There were quite a few sex scenes, although to their credit no one’s nether regions were on display. The language is also vulgar at times if you’re not into that. Not all the story lines were wrapped up as neatly as others. There were some coincidences that were way too convenient. I didn’t agree with every piece of advice in the movie.

Overall {some spoilers ahead}: 
I actually enjoyed this movie, which meant a lot to me since I seemed to be on a roll with bad African movies. I found it funny in parts, I didn’t think the acting was overdone, and the use of a narrator helped to push the story forward comfortably without us having to see every single event. My biggest issue came from the advice that was given, mostly from the narrator – I couldn’t tell if it was being given seriously or if it was just because she was jaded by love. For instance, I don’t believe that men are predisposed to cheat because they are men. I have never bought that argument and I never will. Also, the story wrapped up a bit too neatly. It was fine for the overall message that you have to work hard to make a relationship successful, but there are so many more factors involved, especially when cheating is in the mix, that went ignored. Also, there were some opportunities for more dramatic scenes that were also largely ignored. All that aside though, I would recommend this movie. Take some of the morals preached with a grain of salt, but it is a nice movie. The humor definitely helps it.

Photo via omgghana.com

Monday, June 3, 2013

Compulsory Risk 1&2





Cast: 
Chidiebere and Chidinma Aneke (“Aneke Twins”), Van Vicker, Patience Ozokwor, Camilla Mbereke

Plot: 
 Martha and Mary are twin sisters whose relationship is put to the test when Mary marries Martha's boyfriend while her sister is away, successfully deceiving everyone, all in the name of helping her. What happens when everyone finds out the truth?

Pros: 
They were actual identical twins, not the same person playing two roles or two people who vaguely look alike. The premise is interesting. The acting was manageable on some fronts.

Cons:  
The story was rubbish – time that could have been used to flesh out the story was spent on nothing useful. Production had some suspect moments {SPOILER ALERT: The wedding scene involves “snapshots” of the wedding that were clearly paused video if the twitching was anything to go by}. 

Overall (some spoilers ahead): 
I was very disappointed because I saw where the story could have gone but for whatever reason, the writers decided to take the lazy way out. There were way too many coincidences and “how can” moments for it to be believable, and the conclusion was way too convenient. Why did neither Stanley nor Martha know the other’s whereabouts? Why the hell did Mary even take Martha’s spot in the first place? We’re told it was so the man wouldn’t run off with anyone else but that is just a load of nonsense. Personally, I don’t think this movie is worth the watch but if unlike me, you’re able to get past the lack of motivators and the plot holes, you might enjoy it.

Friday, May 24, 2013

Yankee Girls (Sequel: Return of Yankee Girls)

Yup! y'all know it! FOOOLISH movie! ... I am HIGHLY , nope scratch that, I am STUPENDOUSLY disappointed in the fact that reputable Nollywood celebrities have their names associated with this mess of a movie! Like WHY???

Honestly am not going to waste much time with this review  - this is gonna be a very basic review because ... well just because ... i do not wish to get carpal's tunnel over this mess. 


Starring: Omotola Jalade Ekeinde, Rita Dominic, Stella-Damascus, Emeka Nwafor, Uche Elendu, Uche Obodo


Edikan (1&2)


I saw this movie awhile ago but miraculously came across it on irokotv again last night so I re-watched it to refresh my memory and provide the best review. I love this movie, even though it was in ibibio language, it had subtitles and was easy to follow. This movie touched something within me, something that makes me so angry at parents who carry a child for 9 months, bring them into this world, only to label them a witch in the name of religion. I don't know what religion they are naming, but that is pure idiosyncrasy and illiteracy. Gosh I just can't. We have so many parents looking for children; yet, some ignorant-ass parents who have kids, banish their children and treat them like slaves all in the name of the "kid is cursed." This movie shed light on so many issues facing young children in the African society today (I say African because am only familiar with the African part, it's probably happening somewhere else in the world as well).

Starring: 
Ini Edo - Inspector, Nse Ikpe Etim - Cynthia, Sophiana Jones - Ime, Moses Armstrong - Etebom, Ime Bishop - Pastor Zechariach, Ine Ikpe - Idara


Timeless Passion (Sequel: Passionate Heart)

Disclaimer: I saw this movie a long time ago, it's basically been sitting behind-the-scenes as a draft post and I am trying to clean up and publish all my incomplete draft posts. So this is one of them. I still remember the basic koko of the movie but I can't do a very detailed review because I don't remember most of the details. And nope I can't be bothered to go re-watch it now  #aintnobodygottimeforthat!

Starring:
Uche Jombo - Uzor
Ramsey Nouah - Andrew
Desmond Elliot - Calvin
Monalisa Chinda - Mildred
Chisom Oz-Lee - Ifeanyi
Susan Peters - Nkiru
Uru Eke - Jessica


Plot Summary:
Mildred, the "god-is-my-strength-thus-i-shall-not-fight-for-myself-and-kids widow who returns to Nigeria with her kids to mourn  her husband/their father. However, they are met with animosity from their in-laws (specifically the frustrated-devil's-incarnate-sister-in-law who is the major instigator) who accuse Mildred of killing her husband, and decide to make her life miserable until she confesses to her crimes. Her sister-in-law, Ifeanyi, basically makes it her life's mission to see to it that Mildred goes through all the widowhood rites, and even seizes her passport and that of her kids so that they can’t return to UK. In the bid to find some peace of mind, she (Mildred) goes to church and from there she meets this man, Andrew, who follows her home. As the movie progresses, we find out more about Andrew -  who is he? why does he care so much about a woman he barely knows? do they fall in love and live happily ever after? hehe I kid I kid lol ... Meanwhile, her wayward-British-brought-up-spoiled-brat of a daughter is running amok and fighting with her mother over Andrew because she has the hots for him. Gaijawood say what? LOL .... Anyway you guys have to watch to figure out what happened.

Pros: 
It is a simple movie that had its funny moments (esp. the church scene with Jessica trying to get Andrew's attention lmao) and it's romance was clean (nothing too sappy thank God). Oh and let's not forget the scene where Ramsey is kneeling at the altar in church and screaming at the Lord for help ... all I could think of was how beautiful this man is (yes he is married and am a sinner but choi!).

Cons:
The audio was pretty messed up in some scenes, you have to keep turning it down or turning it up
Only Jessica had a British accent in the movie - LOL I guess Mildred and the other two kids decided not to bother themselves. 

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Married but Living Single


Starring: Joke Silva, Joseph Benjamin, Funke Akindele, Femi Brainard, Tina Mba, Kiki Cornely

Plot
The movie basically follows the lives of two couples:
Kate and Mike:
Kate (Funke) is the career driven wife of Mike Iheagwam (Joseph Benjamin) and the creative director if an advertising agency - her boss, Mrs. Ibru, is played by Joke Silva. Kate fancies her job more than her family, she has no time for her husband or their only child and daughter, Mabel. Mrs. Ibru doesn't even help matters as she constantly dangles all these promotional goodies which Kate is unable to resist. As the plot thickens, we find out Mike is sick and needs some life-altering surgery in India but his ever busy wife could  not travel with her husband for this life or death operation. the husband travels on his own and meets Titi Haastrup in India. Titi stood by his side throughout the operation and became his rock in India and of course they develop this friendship/affair. When he gets back to Nigeria with Titi by his side, we find out that not only is she Kate's nemesis in the marital home, she is also her nemesis in the job front as Titi is a top employee in a competing adverting firm.

Patrick and Lola
Patrick (Kalejaiye Adeboye Paul) is an abusive husband who embarrasses  degrades and beats up his wife Lola every chance he gets and eventually beats her to death.

!!! Spoilers Ahead !!!

Letters To My Mother

Honestly I can't quite decide how I feel about this movie - I don't know if I should be annoyed or if I should just burst out laughing! Sigh here goes: 


Starring John Dumelo, Kafui Danku, Adjetey Anang, Paulina Oduro, Eddie Watson, Roselyn Ngissah

Plot:
It's basically a story of this mentally disturbed man, Mike (John Dumelo), who is incarcerated in an institution and has not said a word to anyone for the past 5 (or 6) years. All he does is write letters to his mother. Eventually, they send this renowned psychiatrist (played by Adjetey Anang) to take on Mike as a patient and during his visits to Mike, he starts reading through the numerous letters Mike had written to his mother. 
From these letters we learn of how Mike returned home from overseas with Angie (Kafui Danku) - his fiance and mother of his unborn child - in a bid to introduce her to his beloved mother (Paulina Oduro) and seek her blessings to marry the woman he loves. However, he is shocked to find his mother highly unwelcoming to his new bride and she wouldn't give him a descent explanation as to why she has such strong disapproval and neither would his wife Angie shed any light on the enmity between her and her future mother-in-law. Through a series of events and circumstances Mike finally learns the truth which was basically full of the wickedness and betrayal of human beings. All these events then led to his mental/psychotic breakdown and lots of bloodshed.

Okay guys, that was the best I could do without giving too much of the storyline away or did i already give too much? LOL

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

Breath of love (Sequel: Series of love)

Starring:
Ramsey Noah – Ahmed
Vincent Opurum – Idrisse
Chika Ike – Gracie
Chigozie Atuanya- Bright
Halima Abubakar – Mona
Ruth Kadiri – Ella
David McKenze – Alhaji Bello
Joshua Johnson – Rev Emma
Patience Oseni – Ahjiyah
Sophia Muhammed – Zainab




Plot Summary:
Ahmed meets Gracie one night when she drunkenly leaves a bar and attempts to operate her vehicle. He comes to her rescue by putting her in his car and taking her home. A few days later, their paths happen to collide again, this time at a fast food joint where Gracie is having lunch with her co-worker/BFF, Bright. Initially, Ahmed is too scared to approach Gracie as he thinks that Bright is her boyfriend; however, once he does his research and finds out that Bright is in fact just a friend he begins to pursue Gracie relentlessly. So what is the problem you wonder (I just said that in my best Julie Andrews from sound of music voice)- well, he is Muslim and she is Christian.

!!!Spoilers ahead!!!

Tuesday, May 21, 2013

Ekaette (aka Ekaete)



Starring:
Eucharia Anunobi – Mrs Uzomma
Desmond Elliot – Tony
Carolcee Ejemurua – Ekaete
Ini Ikpi – Ekaete's mum
Oto Tom – Mma (Ekaete's friend)


Basically
Ekaette, an 18 year old ambitious village girl from Akwa Ibom with poor educational background, dreams of going to Lagos one day to find a job in order to provide for her family. Her dream appears to come true when a family friend, Mrs. Uzomma, visits her village and promises to set her up in business on the condition that she works for her as a house girl for a year. Being an ambitious and optimistic girl, Ekaette is over the moon at the offer and accepts to go to Lagos, little does she know what "the city that never sleeps" beholds for her. 

!!!Spoilers ahead!!!


When the King Decides (aka When Kings Decide)

This movie was awesome!!!! I haven't laughed this hard in forever, I swear.


Starring: Van Vicker, Mercy Johnson, Ugezu J. Ugezu, Pete Edochie, Jibola Dabor, Ken Erics, Nuella Njubigbo, Eve Esin, Hank Anuku, Charles Awurum

Plot summary:
So basically, the prince of Okwe Kingdom , Nebolisa (Van Vicker) is being forced by his father (Pete Edochie) to marry a woman that has been bred for him. He refuses to marry her because he says she has been programmed; so he pleads with his father to let him travel to a city called "Cable 4" to go find his own bride. In another village, Amuma (Mercy Johnson), a princess of Ireh Kingdom , is betrothed to Harold(Hanks Anuku), the son of the defense minister, but despises his character, so she too decides to go to the city in search of her soul mate. Alas, Van and Mercy both end up in the same city of "Cable 4", and the story begins to unravel.

Pros: 
I know the plot sounds cliche but believe me, this is the first African movie I've seen that has 4 parts that I actually recommend. Every single scene was worth it - the cast did an excellent job (even Van Vicker surprisingly!), the story was fully developed, it was a beautiful mixture of comedy, more comedy, more and more comedy lol, romance and drama. 
Everyone truly delivered -
The taxi driver, Desmond (played by Charles Awurum) - what a hilarious guy; 
Let's not forget, Van Vicker's protector/BFF/PA, Nwokoye (played by Ugezu J. Ugezu) - haha he killed me, what a clown!

Cons: 
It dragged on for 4-parts (but I enjoyed it so much, I didn't mind at all). It has it's similarities to coming to america w/ Eddie Murphy, however if you loved coming to america, you will definitely love this. 
Texas, the guy that came back from america to marry Mercy Johnson - gosh he irritated me. His accent was so fake, he was just a thug in fact - he just kept cursing and using the N word and saying: "ya know w'am sayin", "na mean" ... msteew am still annoyed they put him in this movie, he almost spoiled the almost perfect movie (yea I know I used almost twice :D)

!!!Spoilers Ahead!!
So many memorable lines in this movie: 
  1. Desmond telling some girl (that turned down Van Vicker's proposal): "Please don't embarrass me in my environment!!! Let these useless men of 'cable 4' continue to dig the bottomless pit of your lower abdomen" 
  1. Royal Guard: "Nwokoye in his last letter, told me they where coming back with a bank your majesty, I don't know what that means" 
  2. King: "you young men have a way of thinking that stupidity is your exclusive prerogative... (brief silence) ... now get out!" 
  1. Sandra: "I beg your pardon" 
  2. Desmond: "don't beg my pardon because u will not get it" 
  1. Nwokoye "I have lived with very responsible girls. I have uploaded many responsible girls. In fact, I have downloaded many responsible girls." 
Lastly:
The ending of this movie was awesome too, I definitely didn't see the surprising twist coming.

Recommended?
Yes! I highly recommend and thankfully, it's free on many sites online. 

Food for thought:
Van V - "I think decency depends on the individual and not where you live" 
Nwokoye (Ugezu J. Ugezu) - "I disagree with you, a decent girl cannot emerge from the ghetto" 

I personally agree with Van Vicker on this one

Enjoy guys,
~Yv❤

Thursday, May 16, 2013

Wicked Intentions

Featuring: Stephanie Okereke, Desmond Elliot, Nadia Buari, Susan Peters, Muna Ibekwe

Supporting Characters 
Muna = Desmond's BFF
Nadia = Stephanie's BFF. 
Susan Peters = one of the long string of girls whose heart gets broken by Desmond (she is Desmond's victim of mistaken identity - will make sense when you watch the movie)

Main Characters
Jim (Desmond Elliot) - a philandering, sexist, gold-digging SOB (literally)
Charlene (Stephanie Okereke)- independent woman, the real boss lady. Estranged from her father who hates her because she was born a girl. Has difficulty trusting men and so cant commit to any relationship. Wants to have only a female child (yes that's how much she dislikes men). Her super-cunning father tries to hook her up in this political marriage but she detests the man so clearly that was a no-go area. She is basically anti-men, doesn't want to marry anyone but definitely wants to have a child. She decides to make her desires come true except she needs a sperm donor and goes to hunt for one (Nope not sperm bank kind of donor but sperm-donor-with-benefits excluding marriage lol)


Plot:
so what happens when boss-man-hating-lady meets philandering -gold-digging man??? Ghen Ghen! watch to find out.

exclaimPossible SPOILERS Ahead - Continue at your own riskexclaim

Holding Hope

This is another great movie I saw recently. It had its moments for the most part and the few moments I could do without a simple forward click solved the problem.


Featuring Desmond Elliot, Uche Jombo, and Nadia Buari.  
Desmond Elliot plays the spoiled,conceited, narcissistic (... need more adjectives :P) rich momma's boy who is used to having  everything his way. He is a managing director in his mother's very successful business empire but he doesn't take work seriously - comes in late, parties all night, comes in some days, doesn't come in when he doesn't feel like it ya da ya da ya da. Anyway, his mum gets tired of her son's mismanagement of funds and decides to hire a new financial director (played by Uche Jombo). The new financial director introduces a lot of financial restrictions that begin crafting Desmond's plans - so, he and his greedy employee-girlfriend (played by Nadia) hatch a plan to get rid of Uche Jombo. Somewhere during the main plot, we find out his mother has terminal cancer and that's the main reason she had hired the financial director - i.e. she wanted to leave her company in capable hands upon her death. Seeing as she was highly fond of Uche, she definitely did not mind willing her firm solely to Uche. Thus, she stipulated that the only way her son would get control of the company upon her death would be to get his act together and also marry Uche Jombo (with Uche's acceptance of course). 
Am going to stop here because I do not want to spoil the whole movie for you all - believe me the plot gets a whole lot better from here

Trailer:

I recommend this movie because it's really touching and it is the epitome of "you don't know what you have until you lose it". Desmond did not appreciate Uche and what she stood for throughout this movie and by the time he came to his senses, it was pretty much too late. Please watch this movie guys, you wont regret it. But "ahem ahem" it's a Nollywood movie ooo, so have your hands on your mouse (or remote control) ready to fast forward, yes you read right.

Ok that's all for now.
The movie is on www.irokotv.com, it's free and it only has two (2) parts so that's a blessing! Anyway, enjoy guys and drop comments to let me know what you think.


~Yv 



Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Mrs. Somebody



LOL! Yes I am still laughing, I can't help it. 

My people, I have definitely fallen in love with Uche Jombo and will watch more of her movies. I know in the past I've said she is not all that in the acting department but I can honestly say she has come a looooong way. She did an awesome job in this movie. Yup! she definitely delivered. I haven't laughed this hard in a Nollywood movie in so long (well actually I haven't seen one in a long while - school problems)... but anyway, where do I begin?



Featuring Uche Jombo, Yemi Blaq and Kenneth Okolie, this movie right here = Commedrama LOL. The basic gist is that this young lady (played by Uche Jombo) is so desperate to get married after her numerous failed relationships that nothing can come in the way of her current boyfriend marrying her. She goes to church one day and her pastor delivers this amazing, thunder-striking, fire-lightening, bolt-off-your-sit-and-shout-ALLELUIA sermon that gets our lovely lady all fired up with new found faith and hope. So she proceeds to do the following (from Bellanaija Article):


Become His Mother’s Best Friend 
Attend Every Family Function 
Cook Your Heart Out. 
Let Him Win most Arguments 
Minimize Your Outings 
Always Look Smashing 
He Must be Your Plus+One For all Weddings. 
Catching The Bouquet. 
You Don’t need an 18-carat Diamond Tiffany& co Engagement Ring. 
Buy your wedding dress and deposit for a reception venue! 
PRAY PRAY PRAY! Cast out those demons against your marital bonding and sweep them out with broom 


LOL just kidding - She didn't really do all that was listed above but you have to watch to find out which ones she did do. This movie is hilarious and comes highly recommended. Kudos to Uche Jombo for a job well done. 


You can watch the movie at irokotv.com and its free!





Yes am back for the summer, look forward to more great reviews guys xx


~Yv❤